beldarzfixon (beldarzfixon) wrote,

Signs and (unim)portents

For several weeks, there was a face in my basement.

Whenever I turned on the basement light, this would appear at the foot of the stairs:

(Photo of shadow cast by box and its contents, looking like a large face in profile)

I need to go down there every day -- to get a can of something, or fetch something from the downstairs freezer, or to deal with an ongoing plumbing issue.

And every day he was there to greet me. I avoided stepping on him, and actually apologized when my foot once grazed his nose. I have not heard him say anything to me in return. I don't remember when he first appeared, or anything in particular happening the day I first noticed him. My fortunes since he showed up have neither improved nor worsened.

As mysterious things around me go, he's pretty typical.

I first noticed moments of deja vu when I was a teenager. I remember one extremely strong instance, at a get-together after a 4-H camp, when I, on a whim, pushed a couple of my peers into the swimming pool. They were a little annoyed, but not too upset, and in the half-hour that followed, I had a major feeling that I had seen this place (which I had never been to before) and these people in these circumstances before in a dream. Though I tried to stay calm, inside I was freaking, trying to remember what happened next. Was I in major trouble? Were horrible consequences imminent?

My folks arrived and took me home without incident, and nothing really ever came of that day. I had worried for nothing, but the sensations that triggered it, I knew, were real.

From time to time, I'll get hit with a few seconds of deja vu, and I'll try to make some note of it, watch for anything good or ill that it portends. But so far I'm batting zero-zero-zero; it seems my oracle is busted.

A few months ago, my significant other, the_dark_snack, had such a strong sense of deja vu that it triggered a bout of nausea -- had her head and stomach aching for the rest of the day. I felt nothing.

It's a little discouraging to know that I'm only a very minor-league psychic -- pee-wee league? -- but at least I'm not a fake pretending I have some bigger talent. Besides, I live in a world that largely doesn't believe in such stuff (or won't admit to it).

And besides, I've long had this sense that the fact that super-awesome things don't happen to me is balanced out by super-awful things not happening. So I'll take my mediocrity in stride.

A couple of weeks ago, I had to look for something in that box in the basement. Now the face is gone. I miss him, but nothing's really changed since he went away, either.

- - -
This is my entry for LJ Idol, Season 8, Week 34, Topic three of three: "Auguries."
Big thanks to Dark Snack for helping with the image.
Tags: lj idol, lji season 8 entries, nonfiction
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